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There’s the ego trip of being with a teenager who is so easily impressed that a car, or a flat – any signifier of independence – can seem dazzlingly mature. But it’s also emotionally and intellectually unbalanced and potentially exploitative.
What I remember most about the girls I knew who dated older men was how confident they were among their friends, and how passive they were around their boyfriends. Different people have different preferences,” would suggest that attitudes are changing and that there is a sense that, when an older man pursues a much younger woman, something’s not quite right. Even so, I still hear male friends defending these partnerships, which always makes me wonder: what if it were your daughter? We still have a long way to go before grown men stop seeing teenage girls as ripe for the picking.
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It won’t stop once she is “of age” either, though I can only pray that this will be the extent of her dealings with creeps who are old enough to know better.
It’s only when we are older that we begin to understand these exchanges between young girls and older men, the power play at the heart of them and the damage that can be done.
There is, of course, a world of difference between a man who grooms and abuses children and one with a predilection for younger women.
The law has provided a line in the sand, and that line is 16.
Most importantly, the law is now frequently (but not always) being enforced.
Why can't they find a partner in Ukraine or Russia?
The answer to this question has historical, political and economical roots.
Those were the days when men joked about bedding teenagers and the concept of consent was rarely discussed.
Lori Maddox, who lost her virginity to Bowie when she was 15, still maintains it was the greatest night of her life, though Mandy Smith, who was 14 when she began dating the Rolling Stone Bill Wyman, has talked about depression and having had her childhood stolen.